My first crack at extracurricular creative writing

On The Other Side

Discover Emere's world full of fantastic beasts. This is a children's story intended for young readers to explore their imagination and expand their vocabulary.
In The Beginning
Emere is a dreamer, and he dreamed of the most impossible and fantastic things. In his mind he could see dragons, fairies, and ghosts. He often wandered into the forest and imagined that he was surrounded by his mythical creatures.
The Astomi are small people with hairy bodies, no mouths, and they live off of smelling delicious smells. They surround themselves with lavendar, vanilla, apples, cinnamon, and anything else they can find that gives off a pleasant aroma.
The Balour is a ferocious three headed dragon, who guards a princess and none but the bravest heroes can get past the three fanged fire breathing heads. Greedy people also hunt the Balour because its saliva forms precious gems.
Although Emere could not see Chukwa, he knew that Chuckwa is a giant turtle that supported the world on the back of its shell. Chuckwa has been carrying the world on its back since the dawn of time, and would continue to do so until no one believed in him anymore.  
Dryads are tree nymphs, and every tree has its own nymph to dance with the wind, and create beautiful music through the rustling of the branches and leaves. Dryads only take form outside of their trees with leaves and flower petals; they gather the leaves with the wind created with the branches and they dance outside the trees in the warm sun.
Emere found other children like him, children who could move through their own worlds and this fantastic world of wonderful creatures. They in turn were each called Emere, and he loved them for they knew of this secret world beyond their own and it made him happy.
Fairies dancing lightly from petal to petal, flower to flower, in the eternal dance of the ages. The Fairies live in the flowers, breathe the flowers, and protect the flowers. They also like to play tricks like tugging on the ears of travelers only to disappear when they turn around to see who is there.
A great bird came swooping down from the sky with the razor sharp beak, long graceful wings, and curved talons of an eagle, a head, massive body, and sly tail of a lion. It stood proud and tall in the forest, king of the land and the sky, the Griffin.
Wandering the forests and villages was a beautiful woman with an enchanting voice, and all the princes and heroes fought for her affection. When she had finally chosen one to marry she revealed herself for the old ugly Hag that was beneath the magic and tricked the handsome young man into being bonded to her forever.
Iku-Turso is the lord and ruler of all the seas. With ferocious horns and a thousand tentacles he has all the waters within his grasp.
Jack-In-Irons is a giant who roams the forest with large heavy chains draped across his body and a massive spike club in one hand. He is too tall to see anyone on the ground, so he is terribly lonely because he feels he is the only living creature besides the birds.
Looking up at the sky Emere saw Katsura-Otoko. Katsura-Otoko is the man on the moon, the ruler of the skies, the clouds, and all the stars. You may only see him when the moon is full and your heart is full of faith.
Ladon is the guarder of Hespirides Golden Apples. With shining scales he winds himself around the garden with the body of a snake and the head of a dragon.
The Minotaur is the most feared of all the mythological creatures. He is not the most feared because of its size, because he is only as tall as a man, but the Minotaur has the head of a bull, the brain of a man, amd he is purely evil.
The Night Marchers are the ghosts of fallen warriors who roam the land at night and visit the sites where they died. They re-enact the way that they died for they were proud soldiers who died for a just cause.
A massive dog as big as a house, as black as the night, Orthrus has two heads and four red eyes glared from the gloom. With teeth as long as a man is tall, and a serpent tail as thick as a tree trunk to twist and crush humans.
Of all the creatures Pegasus is the most majestic. With the body of a horse and wings that are more beautiful than an angel's, to ride on the back of a Pegasus is like being in the presence of true pure magic.
Everyone has a Qareen. The qareen are invisible creatures that whisper into your ear what is right and what is easy. Sometimes you will choose to ignore your qareen in lieu of something fun and adventurous but your Qareen will always lead you down the path of righteousness.
The Raven Spirit is a symbol of someone's soul who is no longer on this earth, and their soul is going on the other side. The other side is not something to be afraid of and your Raven will ensure that your soul gets their safely.
The Sirens fancy themselves as angels, as they are beautiful women with large graceful snowy white wings and lovely angelic voices. Although they have the wings and voices of angels they are evil spirits who sit on rocks in the middle of the ocean and sing their enchanted songs to passing sailors who are put under the Sirens spell and crash into the rocks.
Tritons are like mermaids in that they have bodies of humans and the tails of graceful fish. However, unlike mermaids, Tritons are descendants of the sea god Poseidan, ruler and creator of the ocean. Tritons are male and female and they roam the ocean to look for poachers and people putting poison and garbage in their sacred sea.
Of all the mythical creatures none is as famous as the unicorn. Unicorns appear in peoples dreams, in their hearts, in the corner of their eyes. With the body of the most beautiful white horse you could ever imagine and a magical twisted horn, Unicorns are what the imagination is made of.
Vila live in the clouds, the live in ponds, puddles, lakes, and oceans. Vila control the weather. The weather is a result of their emotions, so you have to be very careful not to offend a Vila, because you might have a snowstorm in the middle of the summer.
The White Lady is any woman who has been killed by someone she loves. The White Lady can be seen wandering the forest, with a sad expression and silver ghost tears streaming down her pale face and streaking her ethereal white dress.
A sign, a symbol, an omen. If you see Xecotcovach you may regard it as any of these things. When this small bird appears to you, you will know it on sight even though you have never seen it before and you may not ever see it again.  Xecotcovach is a pure spirit that appears to other spirits it feels is worthy, and it symbolizes good things to come.
The most cunning of all hunters is the Yuxa. Yuxa are 100 year old snakes who turn into beautiful women to lure men into their lairs only to change back into a horrific gigantic snake and feed the men to their many offspring.
The most hunted creature is the Zlatorog, a deer with beautifully intricate golden antlers. Although no one has been successful in capturing a Zlatorog, it is said that if you offer one of the golden antlers at the base of a mountain the mountain will split in two and offer you a treasure of unimaginable proportions.
In The End
Emere dreamed his dreams and will continue to dream for all of enternity. Step into the other side and see what you can dream.

Working or walking?

To those who know me, know that my athletic abilities balance somewhere between amateur and dismal. As hard as I tried, I never quite had athletic prowess. To avoid looking like a fool with my ridiculously flat duck feet while running, I have taken to taking daily walks. Not only as a form of exercise, but also prying myself away from the computer and smelling fresh air.

It’s probably the dorkiest routine ever, but whatever it prevents me from getting diabetes and keeps my ever growing lower half in check.

It may come as a surprise to no one but guys in my general age bracket are pretty… immature, let’s say. What I mean to say is brainless; but immature works. 

But I digress.

So my daily walks are a time to reflect, relax, and sweat and listen to some terrible indie music that interests no one but me. I enjoy discovering new trails, ways around my neighbourhood, perhaps see a cute dog (owner) or two.  For the most part, I thoroughly enjoy my walks.

Fort McMurray has other plans for my relaxing walks.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my neighbourhood. The municipality could literally not have put me in a better home with a better neighbourhood. BUT. And this is a major but. Almost as big as my butt. Guys in this town act like they’ve never seen a girl walk before. Literally. I’m like a new imported phenomenon that no one has ever seen or even dreamt of the concept. I walk. My lady bits walk with me. This is no reason whatsoever to yell at me from your truck, honk at me, turn around and drive by me again, or speed up really fast when you drive by me.

I know what you’re thinking. Oh Joelle that’s just flattery! They think you’re pretty! NO. This is what I have to say to you dear friends. This is not flattery, at all, ever. Whenever I get a lucky break or something good happens to me someone ALWAYS has to say “Yeah it doesn’t hurt that you’re so pretty!” This friends, is not only incredibly frustrating, but very degrading. Sooo you’re saying I got an A+ in that class because I charmed the teacher with my blonde bouncy hair and infallible smile? I got this wicked job and people are really nice to me because I have nice eyes and a funny little cute voice? NO. I work DAMN hard to achieve my goals.

So next time when you think it’s appropriate to yell “Working or walking” to the girl on the sidewalk, for the love of all that is holy please refrain from doing so. You may just be ruining someone’s favourite part of their day.   

Doesn’t every small hick town of every province have a local drug dealer house?

Fort McMurray has a lot of names. Fort McDirty, Fort McMoney, and of course Little Newfoundland. A lot of people have a lot of different opinions on a place where over 100,000 people call home, but do these opinions hold any water?



We’ve all heard it. Fort McMurray is overrun with crackheads, the venereal diseases, and the under educated over paid. Where do these rumours come from? Well let me tell you.

Most of the rumours about Fort McMurray come from those who couldn’t stand to be away from mommy and daddy. People come up here hoping to make quick, fast, easy cash, so they can go back to their home provinces as soon as possible. People don’t take the time to live within the culture (yes, there’s culture!) of Fort McMurray.




The community residents of Fort McMurray are generally nice, kind, considerate, and they have families! I’ve been here for about two weeks and I have yet to stumble upon a crackhead. Now, don’t get me wrong, every community has its troubles. I have no doubt that if you wanted crack, you could get crack. However, isn’t this true of every community? Doesn’t every small hick town of every province have a local drug dealer house? I’m pretty frickin sure it does.



Fort McMurray has over 100kms of trail systems! I walk a lot, almost every day, and I am constantly discovering new trails and parks. The residential areas are amazingly set up so that there is green space, dog parks, playgrounds, and trails absolutely everywhere you go.


I have made friends already in my short time here. Everyone is very welcoming to newcomers, and everyone knows how to make people feel at home. The municipality is a wonderful place to work, with brand new buildings and amazing initiatives simply on improving the quality of life for its community members.



My opinion may change once winter hits, but for right now, I am loving my Fort McMurray!  


Mourning Cooper


Please stop reading right meow if you get offended by giggles and the nickname’s Faggot and Pussy Willow for kittens :3

Well this summer is almost over, which means I finally have time to post something on my wayward blog. Sister and I had a fantastic summer with the kittens in the apartment. They really added an element of fun on those nights when trash reality TV wasn’t cutting it for us.

Lazer chasing in the best invention for cats in the world. Whether you have a spry, half wild, crazy insane hyper cat, like Pussy Willow, or a fat, lazy, apathetic cat, like Faggot, there’s fun for the whole family.  
Pussy Willow not only chases lazors, she wants to catch them and destroy them with every ounce of her being. Which isn’t much considering Faggot eats all her food, but I digress. She will chase, Scooby Do scrabble, jump, and use all manners of parkour to attain the impossible.

Faggot on the other paw apathetically and sometimes pathetically will reach out with one little arm and swipe at the red dot so slowly you’d think the lazor was in the shape of a snail. Faggot could care less about your lazor. Sometimes he will Scooby Do scrabble after it but that always ends up horribly with him toppling over and then lay there and is to say “Yeah I fell. I meant to. Now I’m going to have a nap here because I meant to fall. Duh. Eff your lazor nonsense.”

Sister discovered one day that Pussy Willow actually has maternal instincts even though her own mother pretty much rejects her at home. Sister plays a video called “kittens and cats meowing” and if you ever need to know where PW is in the house, oh. my. goodness. Is this the video for you. Featuring a plethora of kittens and cats meowing (exactly as advertised) PeeDubs will meekly scurry out from her favourite hiding spots, under Sister’s bed and the fouton, and will investigate immediately. She will climb on your lap and look around every corner of the laptop for the crying kittens and when she can’t find them settles for rubbing up on the laptop screen and biting the corners.

Snuggles and cuddles and abundant in the youngest Nickerson’s domicile.  Faggot always wants cuddles and gives the epic BRRRRUUPPP when you rub his enormous belly. They say you always gain weight when you go on vacation; so it true for Faggot. He gained about 2 pounds in 3 months making him now weigh in at 17.6lbs.

The other day I had to send the kittens home because finals are coming up and I need to pack and clean up a bit around here before the apartment owners come back for the school year. Catching Faggot takes the speed and agility of a sloth. He’ll pretty much do/go anywhere you want him too. PW on the other hand when INSANE as soon as she heard the ominous squeak on the carrier latch. She quickly hid behind the tires in the porch closet, making it impossible to get at her without removing all the tires and shoes. I got a hold of her and as I tried to shove her into the carrier after Faggot, I got the full fury of a part Maine Coon.  My arms looked like I had turned emo for the day, and Pussy Willow ‘hid’ between the window and the screen in the room effectively making her stationary so I could wrap her in a towel and render her claws useless.
And so ended the kittens city vacation with a quick strap into one of dad’s lobster trucks and they were shipped home.

But not all’s well that ends well.  Apparently Sister and Boy have been mourning Faggot. Not PeeDubs because she hates boys. But Faggot is currently being mourned. Mourned and missed in such a way that only a big, fat, Faggot, can be missed. 

Your Drippy Yellow Mystery Sauce is Like Homemade Heaven

Dear Homemade Fish Burger,

Your toasty outer shell of steak bun delight is like a melty crunchy carb heaven. Your mayo is spread ever so delicately, oozing into every crevice. Your drippy yellow mystery sauce is like homemade heaven, and kraft cannot do you justice. Everyone knows that true mouth-watering tartar sauce is made by your sweet caring mother with the random contents of the fridge.

The sweet crispy lettuce gives you just the right touch of green watery delight. Your perfectly balanced bread crumbs encrusting you in a warm swaddle much like a newborn babe protects your flakey flesh goodness. Fresh haddock is your name, and deliciousness is your game.

Ode to the most underrated of all suppertime meals. You are perfect in every way.  

Sincerely, 

Your Biggest Fan