Please stop reading right meow if you get offended by giggles and the nickname’s Faggot and Pussy Willow for kittens :3
Well this summer is almost over, which means I finally have time to post something on my wayward blog. Sister and I had a fantastic summer with the kittens in the apartment. They really added an element of fun on those nights when trash reality TV wasn’t cutting it for us.
Lazer chasing in the best invention for cats in the world. Whether you have a spry, half wild, crazy insane hyper cat, like Pussy Willow, or a fat, lazy, apathetic cat, like Faggot, there’s fun for the whole family.
Pussy Willow not only chases lazors, she wants to catch them and destroy them with every ounce of her being. Which isn’t much considering Faggot eats all her food, but I digress. She will chase, Scooby Do scrabble, jump, and use all manners of parkour to attain the impossible.
Faggot on the other paw apathetically and sometimes pathetically will reach out with one little arm and swipe at the red dot so slowly you’d think the lazor was in the shape of a snail. Faggot could care less about your lazor. Sometimes he will Scooby Do scrabble after it but that always ends up horribly with him toppling over and then lay there and is to say “Yeah I fell. I meant to. Now I’m going to have a nap here because I meant to fall. Duh. Eff your lazor nonsense.”
Sister discovered one day that Pussy Willow actually has maternal instincts even though her own mother pretty much rejects her at home. Sister plays a video called “kittens and cats meowing” and if you ever need to know where PW is in the house, oh. my. goodness. Is this the video for you. Featuring a plethora of kittens and cats meowing (exactly as advertised) PeeDubs will meekly scurry out from her favourite hiding spots, under Sister’s bed and the fouton, and will investigate immediately. She will climb on your lap and look around every corner of the laptop for the crying kittens and when she can’t find them settles for rubbing up on the laptop screen and biting the corners.
Snuggles and cuddles and abundant in the youngest Nickerson’s domicile. Faggot always wants cuddles and gives the epic BRRRRUUPPP when you rub his enormous belly. They say you always gain weight when you go on vacation; so it true for Faggot. He gained about 2 pounds in 3 months making him now weigh in at 17.6lbs.
The other day I had to send the kittens home because finals are coming up and I need to pack and clean up a bit around here before the apartment owners come back for the school year. Catching Faggot takes the speed and agility of a sloth. He’ll pretty much do/go anywhere you want him too. PW on the other hand when INSANE as soon as she heard the ominous squeak on the carrier latch. She quickly hid behind the tires in the porch closet, making it impossible to get at her without removing all the tires and shoes. I got a hold of her and as I tried to shove her into the carrier after Faggot, I got the full fury of a part Maine Coon. My arms looked like I had turned emo for the day, and Pussy Willow ‘hid’ between the window and the screen in the room effectively making her stationary so I could wrap her in a towel and render her claws useless.
And so ended the kittens city vacation with a quick strap into one of dad’s lobster trucks and they were shipped home.
But not all’s well that ends well. Apparently Sister and Boy have been mourning Faggot. Not PeeDubs because she hates boys. But Faggot is currently being mourned. Mourned and missed in such a way that only a big, fat, Faggot, can be missed.